In all the Papal-media-orgazmic-frenzy (which was pretty arousing btw), we forgot to mention that Prince Rainier III of Monaco passed away. He's been the last in what seems to be a list of bigtime deaths in the news. Usually these come in threes, but here, we have a little problem. Seems as tho there are four bigtime celebrity deaths in the last little span...Let's find out who really doesn't belong.
Terry Schiavo -Braindead for 12 years...globally famous in the last 3 weeks of "life" for living through a feeding tube, and being turned into a political football by the conservative right wing. (altho her psychic powers have yet to have been challenged!)
Johnny Cochran...Probably the most famous lawyer of all time (really, name another lawyer, just try) - a powerful advocate for civil rights. Not to mention the kind of quote "the practice" had longed for, for it's entire run..."If it doesn't fit, you must acquit!"
The Pope John Paul II- Leader of the Catholic Church (with near 1-billion members) Credited with ending Communism in Poland, helping bring down the Iron Curtain, and an advocate of Human Rights across the globe.
Prince Rainier III - Longest reigning monarch in Europe, protector of the Principality of Monaco (of which France has had designs on for centuries...you know...those guys), and was married to one of the hottest uber-babes on the planet, ever, Grace Kelly.
- man, the jokes that I want to write here...Race, Pope-ing, Lawyer-ing, Star-Banging, Being bedridden for years...But yaknow, we're gonna have to kick out someone. -fuck, the jokes I want to write here, THE JOKES I WANT TO WRITE HERE...it's just not fair. It really isn't. I only want to offend only some of you, not all of you. Christ's Goatfuck....I just can't do it. In the end, I choose to offend no one.
I'll tell ya this tho, Johnny walked out with some fucking august company.
R.I.P. - alls ya all.
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2 comments:
I knew offending no one would offend YOU "Q." But that wasn't my intent. After coming up with a pretty clever concept and throwning it down (in pretty stylistic prose and layout - I might add) I had three possible endings, each with a different target...
But words are pretty slippery creatures, especially when written. I figured it might be best for folks to draw their own conclusions.
As for being boooo-ed! I do have a thin skin on occasion, but then I just look at my lovely Fjord Awards...and realize I'm doing something right!
i freakin love you, D.T.!!
This post is so damn FUNNY!
And I respect u for not doing the jokes(even though I'm sure I would have thoroughly enjoyed them) It leaves them "to the imagination".
ooh. mystique.
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