Sunday: The Random Review

Well, folks, it looks like it's that time again. It's been awhile and that means I gotta post something. Yes, posting is very much like killing, suing and climbing. You gotta kill something. You gotta sue something. You gotta climb something. You gotta post something. Folks, you simply gotta do something. And, since you can't spell "ranDOm" without "DO," sometimes you gotta ranDOmize something and pray for the best. Pray for us all......

- The only good thing that came outta my time in prison, was my prison life concept album, entitled "Attitude Adjustment: Worth More Than Smokes." It featured such hits as "The I've Got The Sleep With My Mouth Open Blues," and "Ow, Stop Doing That Please."

- I don't look at it so much as "murder," I look at it more as one step closer to that sweet Editors' job at "Comtemporary Killing for Today's Mass Murderer" magazine.

- When two lesbians go on a date and they both pay, do they call it "going Butch?"

- When the gay guy was introduced to me, they told me his name was Richard. I didn't call him that, though. Yeah. Cuz I knew he preferred Dick.

- I'm gonna start calling my cock and balls "Moses & The Hebrewites." Cuz, believe you me, I have definitely been known to part the Red Sea with the end result being the freeing of my unmade peoples.

- I got a haircut yesterday. I got a comb-over. I just wanted to see what it would look like.

- How do you make a panda sad? Tell it Ling-Ling died.

- I was voted "Least Likely to Win a Gold Medal for Women's Gymnastics in the World Championships" in high school.

- Basically, 90% of a shoes' job is to sit there and wait for feet.

Well, you guys there it is, huh? I wasn't gonna publish it, but then I started looking at it the same way I look at pussy........Fuck it..........