They've paved paradise and put up a fucking fjord!!

Hi everyone! How's tricks? Solid, mehopes. Just gonna lay down some random shit here today. It's been a while since my last fjord confession and, well, it's just time is all.

For those of you who don't know, which is probably most of you, if not all of you, but I'm willing to go with some of you, I work with hookers. That's my day job. Talking to hookers. Working through things with hookers. Hell, I'll say it, even troubleshooting with hookers. Now, you're probably wondering just what in the heck it is that I do. Am I a pimp? Am I a driver? A social worker with a concentration on getting girls off the streets? A mobster? A concerned citizen who somehow parlayed a living helping hookers deal with life's problems, such as stain maintenance and how to cool a heated John? To those suggestions, I say, "Heh-heh. How naively sweet, dear readers!" No, I'm none of those things you quickly assumed I was. None of them. I take ads. I'm an ad-taker, dream-maker, love-faker, proving I'm someone not to be trifled with, or messed around with, to be sure. Yes, hookers call me on the telephonic device and place ads in the publication for which I work, in the hopes of scaring up a John or two so that said hookers can make a living. I, or rather my typing hands, are merely a conduit through which these ladies of the evening work. They tell me the ad copy, I transcribe it, it's that simple. Sound glamorous? Well, if you consider a symbiotic phone relationship featuring such wording as "Happy Endings with each massage," or "I provide a real girlfriend experience," to be glamorous, then have I got a job for you!! Frankly, folks, I feel like the lowest paid pimp in the industry......What do you do?

In closing, I'd like to add that I noticed something when I got home from work last night. I noticed that every single time, without fail, my whole entire life, without exception, that whenever I have to take a dump, it's because there was poop in my butt......really makes you think, huh?