HOLY GOATS! THE POPE'S OLD!!!

Catholics Shocked to discover the leader of their Church is 84 years old!

“Dude,” one man on the street was heard to remark, “That’s almost old enough to die of old age!” Unfortunately that one man’s statement might be frighteningly close to the truth…

(via BBC World News)
Pope Has Surgery to Aid Breathing…
A Vatican spokesman said the operation to give the Pope a tracheotomy had been successful. The procedure involves making a hole in the throat through which a tube is inserted to assist breathing.

Hmm. I’m not going to say that sounds serious, but, aww, what the hell…having a tube surgically placed in your throat so you can breathe…”THAT sounds serious.” While we here at Fjord certainly wish the Supreme Pontiff a speedy recovery, we can’t help but wonder about the future, and how we could have some fun with this. Howabout a Pope Pool!

No You Sicko’s! Not a Pope death pool. A more sporting and positive pool, based on the values and good nature of those of us responsible for Fjord. Also, one based on the legal and traditional structure of the Catholic faith and Vatican Law! I mean, let’s bet on which cardinal will become the next Pope!!

Here’s a brief rundown
http://www.catholic-pages.com/pope/election.asp


the Cardinal Electors enter the Conclave to choose which of them will emerge as Holy Roman Pontiff. The Cardinals must take an oath when they first enter the Conclave that they will follow the rules set down by the Pope and that they will maintain absolute secrecy about the voting and deliberations. The penalty for disclosing anything about the conclave that must be kept secret is automatic excommunication.

So basically a bunch of Cardinals go in and vote for the next Pope.

Oooh, this part’s cool. ---
If a new Pope has been elected, the papers are burned with to give white smoke. Otherwise, they give off black smoke, so that the waiting crowds, and the world, know whether their new Holy Father will soon emerge from the Sistine Chapel.

Pretty Suspenseful! Anyways…

To be elected Pope, one Cardinal must receive more than two-thirds of the votes. Except that if 30 elections have taken place without any one Cardinal being elected Pope, then the Cardinals may then elect by simple majority. Once a Cardinal has received the required number of votes, the Dean of the College of Cardinals asks him if he accepts election and by what name he wishes to be called as Pope. On giving assent, the Cardinal immediately becomes Pontifex Maximus, the Holy Roman Pontiff.

COOL!!

So those are the rules! Now, here are the Cardinals (there’s like 183 of ‘em, and I don’t want to cover the next three screens with lists of potential Pontiffs…so hit the link and check those dudes out!) I’m sure you’ll find a couple you like…
http://www.catholic-pages.com/hierarchy/cardinals_list.asp

BTW – due to Vatican legaleeze, there are only 119 guys that actually can VOTE to see who becomes the next Pope!

TOTAL CARDINAL ELECTORS: 119

Okay, so here we have a huge field, and for those of us not familiar with Vatican politics (heh, like we know who YOU THREE are) just check out this handy website, that has all the major players, handicapped with odds!

http://www.online-betting-guide.co.uk/Next-Pope.htm


so pick your favorite horse, and ride him all the way to the top of the Vatican hierarchy! The winner will receive a Fjord prize pack (so far made up of a worn Dario Tsunami T-shirt, with some coffee stains on it…but it might get better) Besides, What exactly, are you doing that’s more important than this?