There might be hundreds, nay thousands of words I could use to describe this horrific beast, but I won't. (crap, there's two)
All I will say with true emotion is I FOUND MY HAT!
That's so awesome.
Friday, May 02, 2008
I suppose you're wondering why I haven't
Done anything on the Giant Squid dissection. Well, it's cause it's super boring. There's nothing there at all. Here's a link with video. It will put you to sleep. There's nothing there but a giant lifeless blob that barely looks like a squid, and that's why I don't care. Maybe it's ennui setting in, or maybe, like from my last post, I'm just getting tired of the novelty of the internet...but the internet is boring me to death. Maybe it's just time Pigglesworth and Gimpson had another adventure.
Anyhoo...over here are some awesomely beautiful photos of shipwrecks.
Anyhoo...over here are some awesomely beautiful photos of shipwrecks.
Thursday, May 01, 2008
I have this little quote
From Warren Ellis - from some interview he did a little while ago. I printed it out, and cut the paper so I could have it lying around making clutter in the vast kitchens of the Casa Aloha Resort and Spa. (soon to be casino - but I have some legal hoops to jump thru to prove I'm part Native American - but that's another, and hopefully massively profitable, story. Anyhoo - the part of the quote I like best is the last bit, which goes like this.
"The motor of innovation and novelty is really kind of cranked up right now, but, in contrast, the general culture is still in a sort of post-millennial shock, just laying there and drooling over its nipples."
There's something really important in there...I can feel it. I can sense it. He's right, but, I just can't quite get my head around what it is, or what it means.
According to the free online encyclopedia "...culture is generally refers to patterns of human activity and the symbolic structures that give such activities significance and importance."
Well, that's rather vague...but maybe that's the point. Trying to reimagine, reinvent, or just create new symbolic structures that give meaning to patterns of human activity ain't like doing yer laundry. It's (seems to me) about creating something (art, relationships, organizations, I dunno...add yers here) that is not only understandable to a vast majority of the population, but is powerful enough to fundamentally alter the meaning of how people relate to the world around them.
Yeah, well, that's a stab at it. I'm not saying that's correct, nor am I saying if it is correct, that I have any idea of how to make something that powerful, much less make something that powerful, that would actually work. I just wanted to shoot this into the webmonster, for consideration.
"The motor of innovation and novelty is really kind of cranked up right now, but, in contrast, the general culture is still in a sort of post-millennial shock, just laying there and drooling over its nipples."
There's something really important in there...I can feel it. I can sense it. He's right, but, I just can't quite get my head around what it is, or what it means.
According to the free online encyclopedia "...culture is generally refers to patterns of human activity and the symbolic structures that give such activities significance and importance."
Well, that's rather vague...but maybe that's the point. Trying to reimagine, reinvent, or just create new symbolic structures that give meaning to patterns of human activity ain't like doing yer laundry. It's (seems to me) about creating something (art, relationships, organizations, I dunno...add yers here) that is not only understandable to a vast majority of the population, but is powerful enough to fundamentally alter the meaning of how people relate to the world around them.
Yeah, well, that's a stab at it. I'm not saying that's correct, nor am I saying if it is correct, that I have any idea of how to make something that powerful, much less make something that powerful, that would actually work. I just wanted to shoot this into the webmonster, for consideration.
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Just to letcha' know
The Big Boys are finally catching up to the Penis Shrinking story we broke last week!
Haha, no, not those Big Boys, I ment the Major League Media Demons, like this guy...
Haha, no, not those Big Boys, I ment the Major League Media Demons, like this guy...
Monday, April 28, 2008
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Hurt my hand, tired as fjuck, got a nasty cough...and stuff
Things are just a wee bit tough at the Casa Aloha right now as I one-handedly type this. However, I did need to dial you into this.
(since it's yahoo news and their links always end up M.I.A. I'm putting up the thing for future generations.)
KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.
Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.
Rumours of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings.
Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear, in what some residents said was an attempt to extort cash with the promise of a cure.
"You just have to be accused of that, and people come after you. We've had a number of attempted lynchings. ... You see them covered in marks after being beaten," Kinshasa's police chief, Jean-Dieudonne Oleko, told Reuters on Tuesday.
Police arrested the accused sorcerers and their victims in an effort to avoid the sort of bloodshed seen in Ghana a decade ago, when 12 suspected penis snatchers were beaten to death by angry mobs. The 27 men have since been released.
"I'm tempted to say it's one huge joke," Oleko said.
"But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone home and tried it'," he said.
Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a recent government crackdown on its members.
"It's real. Just yesterday here, there was a man who was a victim. We saw. What was left was tiny," said 29-year-old Alain Kalala, who sells phone credits near a Kinshasa police station.
I for one welcome this anti-sorcerer vigilanteism, and any civilian action that is pro-phallus. As it turns out, I'm not the only one. Please watch the following Reuters video, and be amazed.
(since it's yahoo news and their links always end up M.I.A. I'm putting up the thing for future generations.)
KINSHASA (Reuters) - Police in Congo have arrested 13 suspected sorcerers accused of using black magic to steal or shrink men's penises after a wave of panic and attempted lynchings triggered by the alleged witchcraft.
Reports of so-called penis snatching are not uncommon in West Africa, where belief in traditional religions and witchcraft remains widespread, and where ritual killings to obtain blood or body parts still occur.
Rumours of penis theft began circulating last week in Kinshasa, Democratic Republic of Congo's sprawling capital of some 8 million inhabitants. They quickly dominated radio call-in shows, with listeners advised to beware of fellow passengers in communal taxis wearing gold rings.
Purported victims, 14 of whom were also detained by police, claimed that sorcerers simply touched them to make their genitals shrink or disappear, in what some residents said was an attempt to extort cash with the promise of a cure.
"You just have to be accused of that, and people come after you. We've had a number of attempted lynchings. ... You see them covered in marks after being beaten," Kinshasa's police chief, Jean-Dieudonne Oleko, told Reuters on Tuesday.
Police arrested the accused sorcerers and their victims in an effort to avoid the sort of bloodshed seen in Ghana a decade ago, when 12 suspected penis snatchers were beaten to death by angry mobs. The 27 men have since been released.
"I'm tempted to say it's one huge joke," Oleko said.
"But when you try to tell the victims that their penises are still there, they tell you that it's become tiny or that they've become impotent. To that I tell them, 'How do you know if you haven't gone home and tried it'," he said.
Some Kinshasa residents accuse a separatist sect from nearby Bas-Congo province of being behind the witchcraft in revenge for a recent government crackdown on its members.
"It's real. Just yesterday here, there was a man who was a victim. We saw. What was left was tiny," said 29-year-old Alain Kalala, who sells phone credits near a Kinshasa police station.
I for one welcome this anti-sorcerer vigilanteism, and any civilian action that is pro-phallus. As it turns out, I'm not the only one. Please watch the following Reuters video, and be amazed.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Yeah, I been slackin'
But I have been doin' stuff that ain't quite blog material...perhaps you'll get a small glimpse if I'm feelin' feisty. However, I have also noticed that most of you don't give a rats ass, so I don't feel that bad about it. But I've got that feeling like you've clicked over to find something new and awesome, so I'm going to leave you with this.
This one don't got the best video quality - but it's soundtrack is superior to the other's I've watched.
This one don't got the best video quality - but it's soundtrack is superior to the other's I've watched.
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Checkin' in on sciency news
I guess this is a good thing. A few good hearted people are suing to stop the Large Hadron Collider! Why? Well, there's this...
But Walter L. Wagner and Luis Sancho contend that scientists at the European Center for Nuclear Research, or CERN, have played down the chances that the collider could produce, among other horrors, a tiny black hole, which, they say, could eat the Earth. Or it could spit out something called a “strangelet” that would convert our planet to a shrunken dense dead lump of something called “strange matter.”
Apart from that - everything's great!
But Walter L. Wagner and Luis Sancho contend that scientists at the European Center for Nuclear Research, or CERN, have played down the chances that the collider could produce, among other horrors, a tiny black hole, which, they say, could eat the Earth. Or it could spit out something called a “strangelet” that would convert our planet to a shrunken dense dead lump of something called “strange matter.”
Apart from that - everything's great!
Wednesday, April 09, 2008
Here's a good shirt
Tuesday, April 08, 2008
I'm not sure if this is worth your time
but John's beer drinking records is quite a dedicated work.
(P.S. - this and the last were nabbed from Look at this - which I've raved about before)
(P.S. - this and the last were nabbed from Look at this - which I've raved about before)
Monday, April 07, 2008
Sunday, April 06, 2008
930 don't mean I've all forgotten about 4/4
It might seem a bit shallow that I noticed the passing of 4/4 wid-out a mention. However, back in January of '08 I did pen this little diddy.
Anyhoo, I was scanning thru some second-tier blogs I try and frequent and found this little video I'm about to post up. There's something cool about it, because it says what needs to be said in a way that's constructive. It's all bad, no doubt - so you can feel free to skip it if you came here for some tjypical Fjordian content...there is a new Friday post up, that I think is pretty fun, but whateva', I'm past that today, and starting from Gjods clean slate. It's short, but purtty dang good. Oh yeah, it's also mothafjuckin' 40 years old.
Bee cjool to one another...it's about character.
That dude was also killed by a white man. Looking at this vid for the second time, I don't wanna leave ya with that, I'd rather leave ya with this...just a stupid speach by Bono accepting the NAACP's Chairman's award. You're probly one of the many who wrote that dude off in the 90's (like I did, then later, I did change my mind) but it's a pretty dang good thing to hear.
(P.S His first 30 seconds are drivel, no doubt. The venue is retarded, no doubt, but his words are pretty much no joke, and it get's pretty killa')
Anyhoo, I dig that this (small) post is purtty back-n-white. But that changes in no way, the retardo injustices which have been perpetrated on members of every nationality and race and ethnicity, and religion across our fair planet since we've been recording history in written words and organizing into civilizations which compete for...um...whatever civilizations compete violently for.
There is one struggle that we are all well aware of, that's to love or to hate. Hate requires no understanding, and no higher-level work...it's simply a movement (or emotion, or reaction, or what the fjuck ever) of subjugation, or destruction. It's easy and rewarding...and it easily rewards those who embrace it.
Love is usually the opposite...it is not easy. And the rewards for embracing it, cannot be measured in teevee time, fancy cars, a long life, and massive bank accounts. It's about connecting with people and reaching a common understanding. All sorts of fjucking people, all across the globe that you never thought or believed, you could ever find a single connection with, you could. You have it, (the connection) you are human. It's just motherfjuckin' hard work to filter thru the chaff to find it.
Anyhoo, I was scanning thru some second-tier blogs I try and frequent and found this little video I'm about to post up. There's something cool about it, because it says what needs to be said in a way that's constructive. It's all bad, no doubt - so you can feel free to skip it if you came here for some tjypical Fjordian content...there is a new Friday post up, that I think is pretty fun, but whateva', I'm past that today, and starting from Gjods clean slate. It's short, but purtty dang good. Oh yeah, it's also mothafjuckin' 40 years old.
Bee cjool to one another...it's about character.
That dude was also killed by a white man. Looking at this vid for the second time, I don't wanna leave ya with that, I'd rather leave ya with this...just a stupid speach by Bono accepting the NAACP's Chairman's award. You're probly one of the many who wrote that dude off in the 90's (like I did, then later, I did change my mind) but it's a pretty dang good thing to hear.
(P.S His first 30 seconds are drivel, no doubt. The venue is retarded, no doubt, but his words are pretty much no joke, and it get's pretty killa')
Anyhoo, I dig that this (small) post is purtty back-n-white. But that changes in no way, the retardo injustices which have been perpetrated on members of every nationality and race and ethnicity, and religion across our fair planet since we've been recording history in written words and organizing into civilizations which compete for...um...whatever civilizations compete violently for.
There is one struggle that we are all well aware of, that's to love or to hate. Hate requires no understanding, and no higher-level work...it's simply a movement (or emotion, or reaction, or what the fjuck ever) of subjugation, or destruction. It's easy and rewarding...and it easily rewards those who embrace it.
Love is usually the opposite...it is not easy. And the rewards for embracing it, cannot be measured in teevee time, fancy cars, a long life, and massive bank accounts. It's about connecting with people and reaching a common understanding. All sorts of fjucking people, all across the globe that you never thought or believed, you could ever find a single connection with, you could. You have it, (the connection) you are human. It's just motherfjuckin' hard work to filter thru the chaff to find it.
Saturday, April 05, 2008
Friday, April 04, 2008
Just A Friday Video Bonus!
If you don't read "Danger Room" (one of wired's mil-blogs) they've done a series of crazy posts about how to (in real life) stop a 600 foot cloverfield/godzilla monster, how to stop a terminator robot, and this last one how to survive a zombie apocalypse. (if you follow the last link, links to the other stories are at the bottom.) The comments are fjucking great and totally worth exploring...people have great real world ideas, even tho some get way too tech for a guy like me who don't know dick about ammo and military-type specs. Anyhoo from that post, I got this vid, which is exactly what you want from a "non-made-up-threat-to-your-gjoddang-immortal-soul...which you already know are the mummies."
Anyhoo - hopefully you've already armed yourself against the inevitable, and we can move on to more fun stuff. Like this song I heard the other day, and thought, what the fjuck is that song. Fortunately Fjord Borg came up with the answer.
(The vid might not be the keenest, but the audio is pretty right in the pocket)
And finally, this yummy little chunk of goodness from back in the day...
Anyhoo - hopefully you've already armed yourself against the inevitable, and we can move on to more fun stuff. Like this song I heard the other day, and thought, what the fjuck is that song. Fortunately Fjord Borg came up with the answer.
(The vid might not be the keenest, but the audio is pretty right in the pocket)
And finally, this yummy little chunk of goodness from back in the day...
Got hops, big ups, mad handles, and other words and phrases I'd rather not ever hear again.
Friday was on the deck with the other weekdays, reposed in circularly arranged deck furniture. He reached over and grabbed the joint Thursday was passing. He took a hit, and settled back into his chair as smoke oozed its way into his lungs.
"I'm so fucking high." Said Wednesday to nobody in particular.
"There's a motherfjucking coyote in your yard." Said Monday, pointing down and across towards some topiaried shrubs, where there definitely was some kind of feral canine, looking back at them. Monday took the jay from Friday, had a hit and coughed a little while expressing his feelings in an unequivocal, "huh."
Tuesday spoke slowly. "I didn't even know I had a yard."
"Dogote." Said Wednesday. (It came out of his mouth like dog-o-tee)
"What?" Asked Friday.
"Dogote." Repeated Wednesday, "cross between a dog and a coyote."
"There's no such thing!" Thursday said while reaching for an iced tea, resting on a nearby wooden table.
"Sure is. Look it up on my Iphone!" Wednesday pulled his device from a pocket and handed it over, Thursday quickly scrolled to a web-page (which is here. Fjucking interactive Friday post mothafucka'!)
"Whaddayaknow...dogote! Well, I guess it's real, but how do you know that's a dogote?" He pointed out across the yard, but the dogote, or coyote, was nowhere to be seen. "Huh, it's gone."
"I just know it was." Said Wednesday leaning back in the cushions of the self-standing swinging chair he reposed in, closed his eyes, and proceeded to rock the chair with his legs.
"Wait a second," expressed Tuesday with confusion, "I don't have a yard, I have a condo with underground parking, a rooftop pool, and a heli-pad!"
Monday, who had been holding the joint and taking drags all this time looked up, and said to nobody in particular, "I'm so fucking high right now." He looked out of beet-red eyes, which were mere slits, across the rails of the deck and mentioned, "There's a coyote in your yard." He pointed to a grove of trees, where sure enough, some kind of feral canine was resting.
"Dogote." Wednesday said without opening his eyes.
"Seriously guys," began Tuesday, "and I am being totally serious, whose house is this?"
"Trickster God." Friday said.
"What?!" Replied Wednesday and Monday together.
"The Coyote...a Trickster God, in Native American mythos. Clever little fuck, got me more than a few times myself."
Thursday fucked around on the internet with the Iphone (he was still holding) and came up with this. He quickly responded to Friday.
"Sounds like a cool customer."
"Sure." Replied Friday, "lotsa fun. But let yer guard down for a second, and yer in the middle of Times Square in winter - with no clothes!"
"That's the Coyote, not a dogote, which is what is in your yard." Said Wednesday.
Tuesday was exasperated. "Seriously! I don't care if it's a coyote, the Coyote, or a dogote! It's not my yard and it's not my motherfjuckin' house!" He stood up, ready to head towards the sliding glass doors of the deck, into the house, and out onto the street.
"Be cool Tues.," Said Thursday, "It's my house." Tuesday stood for a moment weighing Thursday's words, then slowly sat down.
"I am so fjucking high right now." He said, and shook his head.
Monday began making a series of strangled sounds which the others looked over at. After a few seconds, it was clear he was laughing, but so hard the only sounds that came from his mouth were, "Chit, chit chit, chit..." This continued for a good two minutes. After a moment, he regained enough composure to wipe tears from his face. "Oh my gjod." Was all he was able to say, before cracking up again.
The others smiled like crazy at the display, and wanting to join in the fun, peppered him with "What's so funny?" until he was able to calm down enough to spit out, "Dogote!" He slapped his thigh, and finally reached out for his lemonade, had a sip, took a breath and said, "That is one fjucking funny word."
Happy Friday!
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