Friday, May 02, 2008

Mr Pigglesworth and Mr Gimpson VS The Evil-Eye!













"I say Gimpson," asked Mr. Pigglesworth, "do you place any weight to the notion of the evil eye?"

Mr Gimpson put down his newspaper, and shifted his slippered feet on the ottoman, looking at his friend. "You mean those with a power over dark forces, with which they might becurse a man who crosses their path with an unsavory look?"

"The very same."

"I don't give any weight to it whatsoever. Why do you ask Pigglesworth?"

Mr Pigglesworth walked to the fireplace, which now held only glowing embers, placed a new log upon the grate, and used a poker to summon a small tongue of flame licking over the new wood. "You remember my pocketwatch had recently stopped?"

"Of course, you complained about it last weekend." Gimpson frowned, "Since you hadn't mentioned it, I had assumed you had taken care of it."

"Well, after mentioning it, I felt I shouldn't bring it up again. However, earlier today I went to the watch repair shop, to have it seen to."

"What was the problem?" Gimpson asked.

"A gear had broken a tooth, which had become lodged in another, preventing it from moving. It took all of five minutes to fix." Pigglesworth watched the fire, which was now happily cracking, and moved to sit upon the sitting chair opposite Gimpson.

"Well that's a relief." said Gimpson.

"Yes. However, outside the watch repair shop, I was accosted by five Gypsy urchins who wanted money."

"Not an uncommon occurrence for a dweller of a metropolis."

"Of course." Said Pigglesworth. He squirmed in his chair for a moment, then rose to fix himself a drink. He looked over at Gimpson as he poured scotch from a crystal decanter, "But as I was pushing my way through the rabble, and knocking their hands away from my pockets and other valuable items, an old Gypsy hag emerged suddenly from around the building, and in my haste, I stepped on her foot!"

"I say!" Exclaimed Gimpson.

"Quite." Said Pigglesworth as he took a sip of his drink. "So the woman says, "'Ere Govn'a, shouldn'a treat my youngins as tha they was the plauge! Alls they wanna is a Shillin'." Well, I responded by begging her pardon for stepping on her foot, but stated that I wasn't about to give anyone my money, especially after being molested in such an uncouth manor."

"Then what happend!?" Gimpson asked excitedly.

Mr. Pigglesworth continued his tale. ""Uncouth!" She spit at me, which she really did, as she had no upper teeth, "I'll show ye uncouth! 'Ave a gaze 'ere at my evil-eye!" at which she gave me the most foul look I have ever seen on a human's face."

"My word old chap," said Gimpson, "has anything unfortunate befallen you since then?"

Pigglesworth Moved back to his chair, settled down more comfortably than the first time. "Well, I was nearly run over by a dogcart near Trafalgar, a load of roofing slate fell from the top of Lloyds and crashed practically at my feet, and as I went to the shed for more firewood, I discovered a nest of possums, three of which made for my ankles! Luckily I wasn't wearing loafers."

"It does seem as if you've had your share of near things today. Do you give weight to this Gypsy woman's evil-eye?"

"Against my better judgement, I would guess there may be something to it." Pigglesworth stood up, refilled his glass, and had another sip. He stood by the fire for a moment, then drew himself up and spoke in a more defiant tone. "Now Gimpson, you know I'm a rational man, I believe in science and technology, and won't be drawn into believing in curses! But I daresay I see the old hag's look each time I blink. It's unnerving."

"Pixies!" Gimpson said.
"Pixies?" Pigglesworth looked over confused.
"Pixies. Gimpson stated as if he was done speaking about it.
"Gimpson," asked Pigglesworth, "what do you mean, Pixies?"
"You remember when I used to rent rooms out of the old Holdenhurst Mannor?"

"Of course, they were quite stately...gave you quite a respectable front I might add."

"Yes. But did I ever tell you why I left those stately rooms to take up diggings with you?" Gimpson asked knowingly.
"No."
"Old Holdenhurst Mannor was haunted will all manner of spooks. There was one horrifying apparition which frequented my rooms, which appeared in spectral form with a bloody stump for a neck, and carried it's head under an arm. The head would then hurl a huge vocabulary of insults at me, and then laugh madly."

"My god Gimpson, how often did this happen!?"
"Nightly!"
"You lived there for nearly two years! How did you maintain your sanity!?"

"Pigglesworth, it is why I mentioned Pixies. Whenever I saw things which I think should shake me, I knew that they were impotent in the material plane. However, they did scare me. But that's when I remembered the Pixies, small mischievous fairy creatures which mean no good to mortal man, but really capable of only small tricks. Each time I was faced with such things, I would just think to myself, it's only Pixies playing tricks. And that's how I mastered that! You should try it for yourself."

"You're saying, this old Gypsy hag who gave me the evil-eye was nothing more than a trick played on me by three-inch fairy creatures?"

"Yes! If you're believing in Gypsy curses, you may as well believe in Pixies. And if you believe that, I'd say a Pixie trick is a lot easier to deal with than a Gypsy curse."

Pigglesworth looked at his friend, pondered for a few moments, and without thinking drained the rest of his glass. It appeared that he had made up his mind, because he smiled slightly.

"Pixies!" He laughed, "Who would have thought I'd run into Pixies in the middle of London, right outside the watch repair shop! Gimpson, you've made me much happier. I am in your debt for your take on this affair."

"Not at all, my good man, not at all. Now then, either we spend the rest of the night making some manner of Pixie trap, or we could go to the billiard hall, and see if we can overcome Pixie mischief with the logical physics of solid balls being struck with a stout cue!"

"Capital idea Gimpson. I'll fetch my cloak."



Happy Friday

***Update! Incase you haven't seen the previous adventures of Mr. Pigglesworth and Mr. Gimpson, you can find them directly below!***

Episode One

Episode Two

Episode Three

Episode Four

Episode Five

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