Well, it's nice to see that someone did something while I was away. Thanks for the B-Day good wishes Mr. Hashbrown! Seasons Greetin's to you and yours where-eva' they may be.
Now...down to the real business at hand...
Out there - past the borders of fair Fjordland, inhabited by fair Fjordlings (and by fair I mean "comely" - of course) there is strife. And by strife, I mean, of course - bombers!
And it seems these bombers all hate each other...the stealth-bombers hate the car-bombers...the belt-bombers hate the F-16/F-18 fighter-bombers, and the mail-bombers hate the subway-bombers, and the suicide-bombers hate the Olympic-bombers...and they're all tryin' to blow each other up. I think it's over something someone did a long time ago...or maybe it was last week. Anyhoo, I'm getting the feeling like it's not going to stop.
Of course, in my bullet-proof robot-defended Casa, I don't have that much to fear...and when outside, I'm not much worried...I could dispatch any of the above bombers with my swordcane, no prob. But I am worried about being fucked with when I'm dead. How am I supposed to do anything about looters (of whatever bombing faction you wish to name) stealing my treasure or desecrating my body while I'm helpless, friendless, and dead?!
That's why I'm speculating I'll have my sarcophagus to packed with explosives! When they come to steal my stuff/move my body for a new strip-mall/study and display my remains - BOOM! Haha! Didn't expect me to be a Death-Bomber didja! I'm expecting many people to join my faction. Couldn't you just see it, 1000 years from now a string of random bombings from beyond the grave! It'd be like the Pharaoh's Curse...only more 21st Century Modern.
Morticians will be vilified! Gravediggers will be driven from the county! Tomb-robbers will seek gainful employment! The gravely-ill would be plied with questions from the NSA! Zombies will never be trusted again! The dead will be left to rot in non-scary piles! Mediums would be consulted to try and infiltrate Death-Bomber cells from beyond the grave! The government will declare a Global War Against The Dead! It, as you can see, could get really out of hand.
Which is fine with me, cause, yaknow, the dead kinda' creep me out!
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1 comment:
1)I've been practicing. and YES! Totally Sweet.
2)No I won't! Hundreds will gather to yell insults at my head on a pike. It'll be sweet.
3)I hadn't thought of that, but you're right. A swatch would be a sweet Death-Bomber statement...(maybe even like five or six)
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