ONE!!!!

Alllllllrighty!

I just saw this over at Look At This, and cried laughing. It starts a little slow...but it's worth it. No more words this year...just this.

Well then...

There's a few ways to look at this thing about to happen tomorrow night, and I'm not going to suggest that any are right, since I've seen more than a few years start and finish like albums (yeah, albums, like the vinyl collection I still posses from the pre-C.D. era, gathering dust from the Los-Angel-eeze atmosphere) with a jerk and a horrible ripping sound like a party coming to an awful end. And I've seen 'em repeat or start anew without even a slight hesitation in the mix. I know a lot about stuff and things, but I'll tell ya the most important thing I know at this moment.

It's all real, and it's all yours. No matter how much you want it to be better, and no matter how much you might pretend, or believe that "this" is a moment of your time that will pass by into another moment that's better (or, of course, worse.) it's something more along the lines of this.

All these moments are yours, and they belong to your experience. It doesn't matter what you think of them, the moments you pass through daily are your stories in the future, when yer trying to be witty (say two years in the future) at a cocktail party populated only with strange people you want to impress.

It's a first here at Fjord that I'm gonna quote Lennon, but I want to, and it seems ap-ro-po.

"Life is what happens when yer making other plans"

We've all gots schemes, and I've probly gots a hundred more than youse (no kids...natch)...and I know some peoples who've gots triple that amount in the works...but try and grab ahold of the idea I'm bringing, that no matter how many you're working on, the important shit is always inbetween the successes or failures of all of 'em, and who you get to share your victories and defeats with.

I'd like to slightly modify a well known statement for the International Community of Devoted Fjordlings, which would be,

"A Minor League Media Demon Is In the Details."

Demons and Devils are always in the details, and they don't have to be bad at all. But they are always there, and always lurking. I just hope yer all paying some attention to them, since sooner or later yer going to have yer life flash before your eyes, and it's going to be a bunch of details that happened while you were making all your plans. And I hope to hell that, that Devil shows you a bunch of stuff that's totally, amazingly, great.

Happy New Yar,

Yers,

-Tsunami-

This one always gots to me...

And I'm happy as hell to be able to drop this on yas. It might be a little late, but it don't matter.

Happy everything.

The Pogues - A Fairytale Of New York
Uploaded by vince_suelze

TOOOOOOOO!

Off to see it the Vikes can squeeze into the playoffs...

*sigh*

THREE!

I'm starting to like this...I really am. Clean slate, that fresh "new year smell," and the total lack of work down at the Casa Aloha H.Q., man, this is livin'. (Oh yeah, not like I'm complainin' but we also got three visitors today...coincidence? I think not.)

Now, onto sum quick infomation on what's happnin' with Fridays. I've done a couple of bits on my friend's internet radio station called "Flat Rat Radio" where I do a kickass traffic and weather bit, and it usually absorbs a lotta creative juices whereupon, I don't really feel like telling some new tale of Friday and his band of merry weekdays...umm, on Friday. (There's no show tonite, but check in weekly at 6:00 P.S.T., and you'll hear some good tunes, and me ramblin on about something or other, which will probly be worth yer time.)

Anyhoo, I'm getting better at preparing my Friday bit on Thursday, so maybe if I get clever (not cleaver) I'll start working out a Friday post on Wednesday...but I have to tell yas, it's not entirely likely, unless this new year shit works out in exactly the right way.

But, since we're here now, and there's no show fer me to do, and there's only three djang days left...here's three tasty posts from Friday's past. (They'll probly be worth it...they gots the Tsunami recommendation)

ONE

TWO

THREE

Happy Gjoddamn and Merry Fuckin'!

From Yer Pal Tsunami, over here at the W.C.B of Fjord!

And if yer still here...here's a bonus fjordian classic!

Haha...see in "Fjordian Speak"

"Fjord Days" is like, umm, five days!

Hahahah...well, now that we've laughed at all that, some more sobering news.

here's an interesting take on the ongoing mortgage crisis that's literally fucking the U.S. economy, and will, methinks, pretty much drag us kicking and screaming out of the "Empire Building" business for a while. For those of you who weren't counting, that's 67.6 billion dollars written off...just disappeared, and that was just today. If I was a more adept blogger, I would have been counting since the sub-prime thingymajigger started, but I'm pretty sure were up to a few hundred billion dollars that were just kinda' erased off'n the balance sheets.

I'll finish this one by adding a hearty..."FOUR!"

FJORD DAYS ARE NOT LIKE "FORD DAYS"

Fjord days to the New Yjear!
+++
Is yer slate clean?
Is yer slate so full of crap you'd like to wipe it into the vjoid?
Is yer conscious clean?
Is yer launjdry so dirty you can't even bear to look at it?
Is yer mortal coil ready for another year in this Gjodforsaken (preposterously new) millennium?

Are you drunk enough?
Are you sober enough?
Are you drugged enough?
Are you grounded enough?
Are you supplied with enough to help you get through the beginning of another official "calendar orbit" around our sun?

We, speaking officially from the Casa Aloha...the West Coast Branch of Fjord, are privy to a few things...so lemmy drop it on yas.

1) If you have a clean slate, you've either not been living well, or are near Nirvana, and I hate that band.
2) If you have a slate worth wiping into the void, you probly wanna remember what you lived thru...cause that's the coal life's giving you to make diamonds out of.
3) If you have a conscious, you clearly don't have to worry about it being clean...yer already clean.
4) If you have dirty clothes, you need to realize you're doing better than 60% of the rest of the world, and if you can clean them, yer doing better than 80% of the rest of the world. If you haven't gotten to clean them because yer too busy watching the internets or TiVo, or making the world a better place 'cause yer init, well, yer better than 95% of everybody.
5)You know this as well as I...yer mortal coil is ready for anything that's thrown at it, and it'll be fine.

+++

6)Drunk enough is all a matter of perspective.
7)Sober enough, is a matter of perspective, and willpower.
8)Drugged enough...??? We live in a world of drugs, and if some work for yas, well, good on ya.
9)Grounded? Hah! If you've read anything from Fjord over the last two years and have come back...I'm pretty sure you're grounded as fjuck.
10)You know as well as I, that this new year is just another day. The Sun and the Moon do not use heralds to trumpet in another month, nor another year. Angels and Cherubs do not show up once you've turned another year older. Whatever you've got, will be more than enough to get you the stuff you need to get you thru this next one.

And you know that's all true.

Sorry fjord the delay

But like every year, around this time, I'm busy saving Christmas. Yeah, yeah, I hear you asking, "whaddayamean Tsunami??" Well, what I mean, is that since 1997 or so, I've been saving x-mas, and any of your x-mas's since then are because of me! I'm busy right now doing x-actly that, and because of it, I've got no time to blog! So hold your collective breath until I do, (at which time I will probably be enjoying my Christmas- and so will you) and after you've enjoyed a most awesome holiday, maybe you'll think to thank me for providing another seemless Christmas. Probly not, but that's okay. I clearly don't mind sacrificing myself for the greater good.

Happy Holidays,

-Tsunami-

So...to continue...

I've spent a little while on the internets today, and came up with this...



"I get nervous in social situations motha' fucka'"
classic.

Umm...guys...err...listen...

You should really go here and watch at least one episode of Teen Girl Squad. It'll be worth it. I promise.

Dig this!

Just too astounding.

(click for most-excellent-embiggification!)

(Found at paleo-future)

We've never crunched the numbers

Here at Fjord. In fact, I have no idea how many of you are "Cat" people, and how many are "Dog" people. I'm staunchly in the "Dog" camp, but have met a couple of totally awesome cats in my time. Anyhoo - I've got this sweet little website you can peruse which deals strictly with cats in war. (and it's pretty interesting)

Sorry Kids

I'd be remiss if I didn't post this...

Celebrity Quote-Off!

Marlene Dietrich...

"The average man is more interested in a woman who is interested in him than he is in a woman with beautiful legs."

Or

Mae West

"Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before."

Our Fjavorite Street Art Hero's Been Working

Banksy went back to the "security wall" in Jerusalem.

There's a few great photos over here.

Just when you thought it was safe...

It's even worse than the mummy lions! It's a gjoddang 77 million-year-old dinosaur!

"How do you stop a 77-million-year-old dinosaur Tusnami?" You ask.

Well, since we haven't done anything to stop a 3,300 year-old one from getting a new sarcophagus, and some (obviously bespelled/possessed idiots) are trying to preserve his mummy-corpse, I'd say the whole task is reasonably hopeless.

However, I would say, like all mummies, you must destroy their physical corpse, which is their connection to the afterlife, and immortality. Consequently, the older they are, the more powerful and tricksy they get. Just like King Tut realized his mummy was being damaged, he got a few mummy helpers (probably with promises of material rewards) to help preserve his corpse. Just like that, a 77 million year-old dinosaur mummy, would probably realize he was about to erode into nothing, and psychically led some archaeologists to the spot of his mummy, and voila! The Mummy Dinosaur continues to devour souls and continue happily in immortality.

As for the original question, I'd suggest the old standby, a flamethrower. Of course, against a dinosaur-sized mummy, it should be a really big one, or at least a few of the regular sized ones.

Jellyfish Swarm Of 10 Square Miles!!! Holy Crap!

Again the world conspires to please me.

Since it's a yahoo news story, and they sometimes dissapear...here's the juicy bits.

BELFAST (AFP) - Northern Ireland's only salmon farm was completely wiped out by a freak jellyfish attack, the owners said Wednesday.

More than 100,000 fish worth more than one million pounds (2.1 million dollars, 1.4 million euros) were killed in the invasion at Glenarm Bay and Red Bay, on the County Antrim north-east coast

"In 30 years, I've never seen anything like it. It was unprecedented, absolutely amazing. The sea was red with these jellyfish and there was nothing we could do about it, absolutely nothing.

"I have never experienced such concentrations of jellyfish spread over such a wide area. The vastness was unbelievable."

The seven-hour attack over Tuesday and Wednesday last week saw the jellyfish covering a sea area of up to 10 square miles (26 square kilometres) and 35 feet (11 metres) deep.